Well, this is a bit a copy of the cleverest artist names topic , but since I had no artists coming in mind and some tracks, I thought a tracks topic would be nice.

Telefon Tel Aviv has some great track names, like:

- Your face reminds me of when I was old.
-What's the use of feet if you haven't got legs.
- Life is all about taking things in and putting things out

I also like "Space Maker" from AIr.

What about you?

Blue Stahli - Leadfoot Getaway & Shotgun Senorita

Sky Eats Airplane - Long walks on short bridges

If you understand french, check Erik Satie's song names....

from wiki

# Pièces froides - trois airs à fuir (1897)
# Pièces froides - trois danses de travers (1897)
# Embryons desséchés (1913)
# Prélude de la porte héroïque du ciel (1897)

Steadycam - In The Moog For Love...... it also happens to be good.

DJ Sneak "You Can't Hide From Your Bud"

I keep tryin' but it always finds me.

Maybe i should stop hiding behind my bong...

(-) by Aphex Twin

Not clever by any means but they do have their qualities:

Ballad of the Nameless Guitar Player
Don't See The Point
Charity Shop Soundclash
brokeback building site
unemployed black astronaut
Gangsta Shit
A Word from Fresh Breath Mouthwash
Building Steam With A Grain Of Salt
Sufferin' Blues
Bad Gameshow Host
Slappy's Tune
I Know What I Like (In Your Wardrobe)
Robbery, Assault And Battery
hard tits
If I Had a Happy Place This Would Be It
Mp3 Killed the CD Star
Fender Bender
Skanky Panky
Valley of the Sausages
I'm Terribly Sorry, I Think I've Broken Your Kylie
Several Species of Small Furry Animals Gathered Together in a Cave and Grooving with a Pict
Porn Coconut Co
Here Come the Bastards
People Equals Shit
foreskin in the food processor
Wasted Early Sunday Morning
Go! Spastic
Everybody Loves You When You're Dead
ShitMix2000
Order of the Ginger Guild

Also "F*ck The Neighbours" from some old Stephan Panev EP.. Loud track to say f*ck you guys - i like my music loud

Amen brother

Backwards Reversal
A Penis Is Just A Great Big Clitoris With A Piss Hole
I'm A Fucking Idiot
Dance Like You're Selling Nails
Hello, My Cock Is An Aardvark
Spiegeltje met Lijntjes

Names taken from Enduser, Venetian Snares and Bong-Ra tracks

Venetian Snares has some of the weirdest track names I've ever come upon. From the album The Connected Series 2 -

Eleven Million Dollars Worth Of Stolen Bearer Bonds
Eleven Million Panda Bears In Bondage
How To Steal And Store An Ice Sculpted Bear
Ice Pirate Not Steeler

They make me smile.

Caural ---> They'll Make a Video Game Out of Killing People Like You
^Probably my Favorite^

Proem - Place Gun to Head Airlines
Proem - Deep like Airline Failure

I always loved Flaming Lips track names too:
- The Stars are So Big and I Am So Small, Do I Stand a Chance?
- Guy Who Got a Headache and Accidentally Saved the World
- Riding to Work in 2025
- Okay, I'll Admit that I Really Don't Understand
- Ego Tripping at the Gates of Hell
- Approaching Pavonis Mons by Balloon

Venetian Snares - How to Steal and Store an Ice Scultped Bear.

I know this thread has been dead for a while, but I stumbled upon it and had to add my 2 cents...

Koma & Bones - Red Hot Pussy Liquor
Sasha - Seal Clubbing
DJ Quest - Pink Sock
Kalon - Man is the Superior Animal
Jesse Somfay - The Days Of My Youth Ended With Broken Bottles
The Zap - I Can See Rainbows
Worthy - Crack-El (Justin Martin's Stoopit Crunk-Ill Hyphy Mix)
London Electricity - The Great Drum & Bass Swindle
Bluetech - Finding the Future by Looking Backwards
Tipper - Tripping the Light Fantastic

Minus the Bear is notorious for amazing track & album titles:

Bands Like It When You Yell "Yar" At Them
Highly Refined Pirates
They Make Beer Commercials Like This
This Is What I Know About Being Gigantic
I Lost All My Money at the Cockfights
Thanks For The Killer Game of Crisco Twister
Hey Wanna Throw Up? Get Me Naked
We Are Not A Football Team
You Kill Bugs Good, Man
Lets Play Guitar in a Five Guitar Band
Booyah Achieved
I'm Totally Not Down With Rob's Alien
Hey! Is That A Ninja Up There
Lemurs Man, Lemurs
Pantsuit... Uggghhh
Potato Juice & Liquid Bread
Lets Play Clowns


McLusky has some great names too:
My Pain and Sadness is More Sad and Painful Than Yours
WhiteLiberalOnWhiteLiberalAction
Rice Is Nice
When They Come Tell Them No
Problems Posing As Solutions

and finally...

"Our Ex-Singer is a Sex Criminal"

Stunt Rock - Anyone Who Names A Track "Anyone Who Names A Track 'So And So Can Kiss My Such And Such Ass' Can Kiss My (Adjective) (Noun) Ass" Can Kiss My (Better Adjective) (Better Noun) Ass

for more weird track names, like...

Ambient Music Never Hurt Anyone
All This Will Embarass Me In 2 Years
You're Web Page Is Useless
So Are You, Dick
At Least Sex Is Okay, Wait, Nevermind

check Stunt Rock

Twenty-Three Lubed Up Schizophrenics With Delusions Of Grandeur
The Half-Eaten Sausage Would Like To See You In His Office
Gluing Carpet To Your Genitals Does Not Make You A Cantaloupe

All by the locust

dev/null - fuck anyone who wasn't into the stuff i'm into before i was

Without a doubt, "Around the World in A Tea Daze"

also great shpongle track names

falling awake
turn up the silence

Kid606 has some good ones:

Dramatic Pause Of Silence To Signify The End Of The Album And Beginning Of Additional Songs Included On The CD To Make People Feel Better About Buying The CD Instead Of The Vinyl Version

Pregnant Cheerleader Theme Song

It'll Take Millions In Plastic Surgery To Make Me Black

Luke Vibert Can Kiss My Indie-Punk Whiteboy Ass


I also have some more Venetian Snares to add:

More Drugs Less Love

Mongoloid Alien

A Giant Alien Force More Violent & Sick Than Anything You Can Imagine

Husikam Rave Dojo

'10£ to get in' by Shut up and Dance

I think the story behind it is how they thought promoters were taking the piss charging people 10£ to get in when they were charging 2-3£ tops for their nights.
Kinda funny when you see some promoters charging £40+ nowadays.

Some cool old skool EP titles:

Love Dove Jay & DJ Biscuits - Music To Be Murdered By E.P.
Hypno-Genesis - The Induction Of A Hypnotic State EP
Hyper-On Experience - Deaf In The Family (A Sad Title For An Otherwise Splendid EP)

Don't know about criteria of "clever" but my most favourite track titles are:

DJ Ton TB - Dream Machine
Front feat. Essence - Touch Me In The Morning
Kamaya Painters - Far From Over
Northwest - Ich Will Fliegen Lernen

Another bump five months late. I saw a guy called Earl Zinger supporting Zero 7 years ago, who had an album called 'put your phazers on stun and throw your health food skywards'. I hadn't thought about him in about five years til I read this threadl. A few others:

FSOL - Vertical Pig
'Come on you slags' by Aphex Twin always makes me laugh out of sheer childishness
+1 for Venetian Snares - Dance like you're selling nails

And of course
The Orb - A Huge Evergrowing Pulsating Brain That Rules From The Centre Of The Ultraworld

hahahaqhahahahaha

fucking perfect illustration of the hipster mentality right there!


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i like teh shpongle track:

nothing is something worth doing

I thought the skull disco EP and CD names where quality.
e.g. Soundboy's Gravestone Gets Desecrated By Vandals
Soundboy's Ashes Get Hacked Up And Spat Out In Disgust EP
Soundboy's Ashes Get Chopped Out And Snorted
Soundboy's Bones Get Buried In The Dirt
and my percy:
[SKULL03] Soundboy's Nuts Get Ground Up Proper.
Nang artwork as well.

Nang, I haven't heard that for a while ^^ Good old Norf Landan. But yeah agree with you on the Skull Disco stuff, some quality tunes on there as well

Two Men and a Lady